Where do I start?

I have so much to cover, so much to tell you, that I don't even know where to begin.  The last few months have been a whirlwind of learning for me. I learned about others, learned about myself, learned about strengths, weaknesses, conscious knowledge, unconscious knowledge and just all kinds of great stuff that I have been storing away in my little nut house, waiting for the day when I should share my nuts with you.

Well today is the day where I begin to dole them out.

I feel as though I have learned more about human behavior in the last 18 months than I learned in my previous 48 1/2 years of life. 

I have always been a scientist-type. To every person that would listen, I would shun the psychologists, dogging them for their contrived experiments and backfitted data. It's about the integrals and the derivatives and the standard deviations and the regression to the mean I would say! The psychologists and psychiatrists are the ones that are nuts! Take your pigeons and stuff them...

But these days, science and psychology mesh more than ever. Brain scans allow us to see real-time the effects of stimuli on our brains.  The things we feel and do are all related to our brain functions and in fact, it is quite scientific and plenty "statisticky" enough for me to get involved.  And I can apply all these things to almost every facet of my being - whether it's in developing and nurturing relationships with family members, mentoring young folks, or improving my poker and basketball games...even my exercise routine is related to how I think and my mental "game".

If I knew what I know now, just might have opted for psychology....of course, then, I probably wouldn't know what a correlation coefficient was or how neon laser works.  Or would I?

It's all good though. 

This is my plan: I am going to introduce you to how we learn and how we become experts at something. Then I am going to talk about emotion and its role in your life.  Then I am going to talk about when emotions are bad, when they are good, and most importantly, how to control them when they are bad.  Because if you can solve this one little piece of your puzzle, you will be far more successful and happier in your life.  How do I know? Because I see the effects of this knowledge and of emotion every single day of my life.  And so do you -  you just don't know it.

Coming very soon: How we learn.  Stay tuned.

Don't Sail Without a Rudder

The biggest mistake I made as a young man was that I didn't have a plan. I had dreams. Dreams come true, but it's rare when they do.

Plans do come true. 

Why don't dreams come true?  Because they have no direction.  They are a rudderless boat drifting about, most of the time in circles, but often running aground or sinking.  Dreams don't know where they are going and they don't know how to get there.

But plans? They have a rudder, an engine, a helmsman, and a Commanding Officer.  Plans move forth deliberately, controlled, and in a specific direction.  They change course when necessary.

My point is this: don't settle for dreams (like me). If you want to be a GM or a CEO, make a plan.  If you want to be a senator, make a plan.  If you want to be a scientist, make a plan.

You can (and should) change this plan as time goes along. Plans are not rigid. But plans give you things on which to focus and on which to improve upon en route your goal.

At his hall of fame acceptance speech Emmitt Smith (Dallas Cowboys) said that in high school he wanted to become the NFL's leading rusher. He said he told his Dad his goal. And his Dad told him, "Emmitt, it is just a dream until you write it down.  After you write it down, it's a goal". Emmitt wrote it down. He also the leading rushing in NFL history.

So, do yourself a favor. Take a few minutes and write down your aspirations and your dreams. And make them your goals.

Believe me, if you do this for every endeavor in life, you will be so far ahead of everyone else, it will not even be a race.

DON'T DREAM! MAKE A PLAN.  It's a no-brainer when you think about it, but unless you have a person  telling you this, you go on drifting about.

If you have any questions, let me know.  I can help further.

That's all for now.

Come On, Pandisco! Come ON!

It was a long time ago, but I remember the two guys vividly. It was at Laurel Race Course in Maryland, late in the day, and it was the last race. In horse racing parlance, the last race is called "the get-out race" by many because it is the last opportunity for unfortunate bettors to get out of the hole in which they have dug themselves.

Anyway, these two relatively thin guys, dressed in jeans and t-shirts, were "on the rail", meaning they were as close to the track as you could possibly get at ground level. They were leaning forward on the track's shoulder-high chain link fence - the only barrier to the track - with their racing program in hand, looking about as hopeful as any two humans could possibly look -  except their look was more one of "need" than hope. In other words, my interpretation of them was that they NEEDED this race, or more accurately, they needed to WIN this race. I felt rather badly because that day, I opted not to bet the last race since I thought it was a random event, and I was sticking around to watch it through my binoculars to hopefully see some trouble or excuse a horse might have for running badly today and that way, I could make a note that he might be a great bet next time he ran. So, I was very comfortable, so to speak, heading into the get-out race, whereas these two poor souls seemed to be squirming with anticipation. Their plight, as I perceived it, made me feel kind of sad.

I won't bore you with the details of the race, but I did take note of the two men as the horses neared the finish line. They were in desperation mode, slapping their racing programs against their hands, as if they were whipping their horse themselves, while yelling "Come on, Pandisco! Come ON!". My heart was broken as Pandisco's jockey had already stood up in his stirrups and was doing nothing more than trying to get the slow horse past the finish line without breaking down. Pandisco, a hopeless bum, sadly, checked in dead last. The two men turned and slowly walked away, heads down, and that was the last I ever saw of them, but I have always wondered how badly they needed ole Pandisco to win. The manner in which they had been emploring Pandisco really made me wonder if they needed this win to make a huge score and to take a big step for themselves or their families.

The point of all this is not, of course, to tell you about the two guys and Pandisco. Rather, I want to tell you how to reach your goals without relying on Pandisco or any other long shot. Because let's face it, it's not likely that we are going get lucky and make a huge life-changing score. Yeah, some people hit the lottery, bad bet that it is, but it's probably not going to be you, me, or anyone you know. Instead, like 99.9% of people that are successful, you and I are going to have to find a way to grind out our successes through preparation, opportunity, and diligence.  And that's why I want to tell you about a great way - perhaps the very best way - to achieve your goals.

Compartmentalize. That's how. Look, you've heard the old saying, "Rome wasn't built in a day." And it's true. If you are going to achieve your goals, you will be far more likely to achieve them by achieving small, measurable goals that add up to the big goal, rather than trying to hit a trifecta, so to speak. Why? Because when you put your goals and achievements into little compartments, three things happen: 1) you are more likely to succeed with small goals and, therefore, your attitude and outlook are far better, 2) when you happen to fail at a small compartmentalized goal, it doesn't discourage so much that you will quit. Instead, since it's a small setback, your attitude will remain good and your resolve will remain strong, and 3) perhaps most importantly, you can analyze what you are doing right or wrong and make adjustments that will help you achieve faster.

Let me give you are very common example: you want to lose twenty pounds. You think you're doing this in a day or a week? A month? Obviously not. But when you think about losing twenty pounds it can be pretty daunting. Oh my God, how am I ever going to twenty pounds? I might die trying!  But what if you compartmentalize the twenty pounds into 1.5 pound increments per week? That's rougly 4,800 calories a week that you have to consume less than your body normally uses to maintain its current weight. That's roughly 685 calories a day.  That's about 230 calories a meal. That's nothing! I submit to you that if you cut down 230 calories a meal, you won't know the difference. You won't ever be hungry. Imagine that! You can lose twenty pounds and not ever be hungry! Why? Because you compartmentalized! Instead of focusing on twenty pounds or how hungry you are going to be, you are eliminating what amounts to one biscuit or donut per meal. Seriously, you can do that with consummate ease.

But it gets even better! When you start viewing things from a small, compartmentalized scope, the successes start to build. Pretty soon, you have compiled so many successes that you realize that you can't lose! Well, actually, you DO lose - you lose FAT! But you know what I mean. When it comes to weight loss, you can even compartmentalize smaller than "by the day".  Try compartmentalizing by the half-day or third-of-a-day. Instead of worrying about losing twenty pounds, just focus on being successful for ONE morning. Then do the same in the afternoon. Then the evening. I am telling you, if you string a morning success together with an afternoon success, you'll be damned if you're gonna want to undo those two successes by overeating in the evening. You see how success begets success? And fascinatingly, after you have conquered 230 calories a meal, do you know what you will want to do?  Yep, conquer 330 calories a meal. It will become FUN! Why? Because winning is FUN and you will be winning SO much, you will want to do it more and more! Nothing creates success more than success. So set yourself up for can't-fail small successes and they will in and of themselves create larger successes. There will be no suffering, no mental anguish, and no struggles.

Compartmentalization can apply to anything in your life in which you have set a goal. Saving for retirement? You're NOT going to get it done in a month. But how many people think, OMG, they say I need soooo much money to retire - I'll never get there, so I'm not going to even try. Maybe Social Security will still be around. (Now,THAT'S a bad bet!)

You see, the larger the goal, the more fearsome it is. Our brains tend to only think of the magnitude of the overall goal without consideration for the means to get there. If you're considering saving for retirement, start saving in very small pieces, and use the same process I described above for losing weight. You will find that taking a small piece out of your paycheck won't even be noticed. And then you will find that you can take more and more out and not even notice (sounds like a Congressional tax plan!) and pretty soon, you will have strung together so much money with so little pain that you will KNOW you are winning and you will KNOW you are going to achieve your goal. Then, you will, out of sheer desire, start to save even more! Because winning is FUN! In fact, it's so fun, it's sick! It's addicting! And it's a great way to live!

So, remember: COMPARTMENTALIZE!  Trust me, it's way, WAY better than yelling, "Come on Pandisco! Come ON!!"

Run, Michael, Run!

The other day, my wife, Judith, was prepping for a colonoscopy and about six hours into her prep, I began to ponder what it would be like to be hungry. I mean, I can't even skip a single meal, let alone go through a colonoscopy prep. How am I going to do it when the time comes? - and that time is quickly approaching as I inch closer to 50, day-by-day.

Then, after she had fasted, oh, for about 15 hours (except for broth and clear liquids), I began to ponder hunger even more.

I have to ask...have you ever been hungry? I'm not talking about missing lunch and being really hungry for dinner. And I'm not talking about missing lunch AND dinner and being in a Godawful ugly mood as you can't wait to get home from work and stuff your face. Nope, not at all...the hunger I'm talking about is wondering-where-your-next-meal-is-coming-from hunger. True hunger. Scary hunger. Time-to-worry hunger.

What if I was really hungry? Would I die? Would I "man up" and find some food? Would I eat a bug or a weed like Survivorman? Would I steal or rob? What would I do? I just don't know, because I've never been tested.

Really, what happens when you are put to the test? I wondered this very thing just today as I was lifting weights in the gym. In thinking about it, I realized that I've never truly tested myself in anything. For example, I have never done a bench press and put myself in the situation where the bar trapped me underneath it because I couldn't do that last rep (no, I'm not that stupid...I would always have a spotter, but you know what I mean). I feel that I have always stopped short of the edge of my absolute "can't do it anymore" zone. I am this way mentally (as with fasting/eating) and physically (as described above). But, honestly, how many people really do ever test themselves to the absolute brink? The great majority of us have no idea what pain, suffering, hunger, mental anguish or torture we can actually endure. We simply don't have the kind of lives where we are ever tested like this, nor do we really care to be in such situations, let a lone purposefully put ourselves in such situations.

But guess what else? My resting heart is 40. FORTY! SOMETIMES IT'S 35! It has been this low all of my life. You know who has a resting heart rate of 35?  World class athletes, that's who. You know, the dudes from Kenya that run 26 miles in about two hours. Yeah, those guys have a resting heart rate of 35. And me. At my last physical, my doctor remarked that I must be a long distance runner, running 13 miles or more a day. I quickly retorted while grabbing a chunk, "Doc, you see this fat? You think I run 13 miles a day and maintain this?" Hell, I have never run farther than five miles in a single workout! 13 miles? Dubious proposition, there. Could I? I have no idea. You know why? I have never put myself to the test! The fact is, I am afraid of the prospect of the pain and suffering (and not to mention that it actually might have longer lasting affects if I don't train up to it).

But the point is, I have this supposedly strong heart, yet, I have never really exercised it in any way, shape, or form near its capacity. Why do you suppose I have never tested myself? Why have I never seen to it to use this heart of mine and run like the wind? Would I die? Would I collapse? What would happen? I don't know and I am not sure if I wanna find out.

But just for argument's sake, let me tell you what would probably happen. I would succeed! I would be just like the genius Forest Gump! I would start running and, yeah, there would be pain after several miles, but pretty soon, that pain would recede and I would just be running and running and running. I would probably be high as kite by then, Elton, and everyone would be standing on the side of the road, cheering and yelling, "Run, Michael, run!"

So what prevents me - no, what prevents US - from testing ourselves? Two things: fear of failure, and fear of the unknown. Somehow, we have it in us that we can't do fantastic things, that we can't be all that we could be, and that we are just destined for a life of mediocrity and fat bellies. And this doesn't just apply to fitness, it applies to almost everything we do. Sad, isn't it?

But you know what? You CAN do it.

You wanna lose 40 pounds? You CAN do it.

You wanna stop smoking? You CAN do it.

You wanna open a business and make wheel barrows of money? You CAN  do it.

You wanna go to law school? You CAN  do it.

You wanna be the best teacher at your school? You CAN be that best teacher!

You can do whatever it is that you want to do, but you have embrace TWO things before you can: 1) you have to be unafraid of the journey and its potential ups and downs, its potential pain, and its potential suffering; AND 2) you have to believe in yourself. Yes, you have to believe in yourself. Because if you don't, who will, except for your Mom?

Think about it.You wanna lose 40 pounds? Ok, what's stopping you? Yeah, I know, you're afraid of the hunger. You're afraid to break your addiction to your night-time Ho Hos. You're afraid of the discipline. You're afraid of the exercise. YOU ARE AFRAID OF THE UNKNOWN AND ITS POTENTIAL PAIN!  But, ask yourself: what's gonna happen if you do it and it hurts? Are you gonna die? Collapse?  Shrivel up into a little ball? Of course not!  You know what's gonna happen, truthfully?  You're gonna succeed! What's more is that you'll probably discover that success was a lot easier than you had imagined it to be. NEW BUS RULE: DON'T BE AFRAID OF THE JOURNEY - EMBRACE IT!

Again, if you are afraid to change your life because you are afraid of the journey and its potential pain, you can't and won't succeed, and worse, you'll never know what success truly means. Because only through that pain, only through that suffering, and only through that hunger, can we actually enjoy the success at the end. You just have to believe in yourself and be unafraid, and your desired results will come to fruition!

Now, tonight when you get into bed and rest your weary head, I want you to think about yourself in relation to the items above. I have said it before, and I'll say it again. You are on the bus. You climbed aboard. And on MY bus, we are NOT afraid AND we believe in ourselves!

Ok, I'm done. It is now time for me contemplate how I am going to get through my colonoscopy prep in a few months.

The runs, Michael, the runs!

Step On The Bus, Gus!

Breaking Bad, the AMC dramas series, has become one of my all-time favorite shows.  I think it's right up there with Sopranos, Seinfeld, and The Honeymooners on my list of faves.

In a recent episode of Breaking Bad, Gustavo Fring, a highly intellectual drug ring leader, made one of the most incredible leadership moves I have ever seen. It's incredible only because it was unforseen. In actuality, it was so simple and basic, it's almost ridiculous. In my life time, I have never seen this move fail. It works every single time. I have used it with unparalleled success and I wish I used it far more often. And now I want to teach it to you because if you learn this one simple "trick", you will not only be on the road to great leadership, you will be a great friend to others.

Actually, it's not a trick whatsover. "Trick" implies that it's sneaky. "Hint" is probably a better word. Let me give you a hint. That's what bus drivers do, at least this one.

Clearly, I 'm not telling you to start up a crystal meth operation. But that's what Gus Fring did and, well, let's just say Gus takes his business seriously. If you don't perform to expectations, you get fired.  As in six-feet-below-ground fired.

Enter Jesse Pinkman, a relatively unimaginitive (my new "nice" word for "knuckleheaded") young man that knows the ABC process of manufacturing crystal meth and has worked as an assistant to the primary crystal meth cook that Gus employs. Unfortunately, Jesse is also a drug addict himself, and his conduct is very detrimental to Gus's business. Gus would love to "fire" Jesse, but the primary cook, Walter White, prevents Jesse's demise by telling Gus that he won't cook meth for Gus if Gus kills Jesse. Held hostage by the situation, Gus comes up with another idea: he alters Jesse's life by making him feel important.

Gus concocts a situation where Jesse must protect one of Gus's main men from robbery and harm during a cash pick-up. The situation is not real, but Jesse doesn't know it and when Jesse protects Gus's man in heroic fashion, Jesse suddenly feels important. He feels like a teammate. He feels like a critical spoke in the wheel. His chest is puffed up. He's high steppin' it! Suddenly, Jesse is a new man.  Gone are his days of tardiness, truancy, and being strung out for days. He becomes a responsible, productive, and reliable member of Gus's mob. Why? Because he feels IMPORTANT.

So this is it: if you want to make someone your friend, if you want to make a person that works for you WANT to work for you and perform better, if you want to motivate a child, if you want to get someone to do something for you, MAKE THEM FEEL IMPORTANT.

You see, after we have food, water, and shelter, the thing we seek, the thing we covet the most, is importance.

Think about your job for a moment. Do you feel important? If so, your job is probably fulfilling. If not, you probably think your boss is lousy leader. And guess what? He/she IS! If your boss has failed to - on some level - make you feel important, he or she has done a very, very poor job of leading you.

If you are a parent, your NUMBER ONE JOB is to make your kids feel important. Think about YOUR parents. Did they make you feel important? If so, you probably have high self-esteem. If not...

If you make your kids feel important, they will high-step themselves through life. They will have confidence. They will have drive. They will very, very likely be successful in anything they do.

Think about your relationships with others. Who do you like the most? Probably those that make you feel important. Who likes you the most? Probably those that you make feel important.

How do you make others feeling imporant? Usually, by taking a genuine interest in their lives. Ask a subordinate employee how his kids are doing in school and suddenly he/she will KNOW you are interested in them. They will automatically consider that they are important because, well, WHY ELSE would you ask about their kids?

Feeling important is like a baby feeling her mother's love. It's cozy. It's protection. It's what we covet. Feeling important is...IMPORTANT. 

Remember a few posts back I said that my tenets of professionalism are Patience, Discipline, Focus, Consistency and Continuous Improvement? Now you have an opportunity to practice the fifth one, Continuous Improvement. Go out and consciously and genuinely make someone feel important. TELL them why they are important to you. You will be amazed at the reaction. By practicing to make people feel important, it will become natural to you. It will become a habit and you will do it effortlessly and subconciously, like getting up in the morning and brushing your teeth. You will be more well-liked and successful than you thought imaginable.

I want to caution you about one thing: don't do this unless you mean it. People will see right through you. You can't bluff importance. Insincerity will show in your eyes and your body language. If you are going to consciously try to make someone feel important, you better well BELEIVE it to be true.

Still, if you can make others feel important in a sincere manner, you will be wayyyyy ahead of where you are now. I hope this is now "crystal" clear. If not, just ask Gus Fring.

My Little Crumb

Despite the requests of several readers, I obviously haven't written anything for a couple of months.  I am not completely sure why...I certainly don't suffer from "writer's block".  Quite the contrary...in fact, I have ideas popping out all the time, mostly when I am ten minutes into a solid run on the treadmill. But, it does take effort to put them down on cyber-paper, and probably what really stops me is that I know that once I start, my perfectionism will kick in and I'll have to proofread the dang thing fifty times before I am comfortable with it. So sick.

But, yeah, it has been really nice for people to ask me when the next blog is coming out. By the way, juuuust in case you aren't up to speed on Internet lingo...this really isn't a blog...it's more of a book or manual than a blog, but I guess "blog" is in vogue, so if you wanna call it a blog, feel free. Sorry for the digression...anyway,  that I have some influence on one or two or ten or one-hundred lives is very fulfilling.  What more could a person ask for than to help others!

(Oh! - speaking of writer's block...how come when a brick layer doesn't feel like going to work, he doesn't just stay in bed and tell his wife, "Honey, I'm not going to work today...I have brick layer's block."  Well, we all know the answer to that one: she'd pop him over the head with a frying pan and tell him to get his ass in gear and get to work! So what's the deal with writer's block? Is it just some excuse for writers to take a day off?  (Ok, I confess...most of you probably recognize this from an episode of Seinfeld...but it's still funny, no matter how you watch or read about it). Writer's block. Yeah, right.)

If you're still with me, I wanna let you know what's coming up in the near future.  I am going to write about three things. These three things are going to open doors and turn on lights for you. One of them, I saw employed by Gustavo Fring (shame on  you if you don't know who Gus is!)...he's a master!  The others, I have been considering for some time and will really divulge how I think, but more importantly, they will enlighten you - perhaps quite a bit - about how YOU live your life and how you try to be and CAN be more happy.

I hope you come back and read what I have to tell you. If you're on the fence, let me tell you what the sage old man at the race track once told me: "Mike, you are about the best handicapper I have ever seen and I know you have incredible insight and technical knowledge about horse racing...but don't ever forget, in every person and in every book, there is a crumb of information that you might not know. Always, always be willing to scoop these crumbs up because eventually, they'll make a cookie. Each little crumb is important. Do not be too smart to think they aren't."

Great advice, old man. Great advice.

Maybe I can give you, my valued readers, a crumb.

See you soon...

How 'bout Them Cowboys!

"Mike, can you please come to my office?"  Those were among the first words I heard from Commander David Masiero when I first transferred to the Coast Guard Navigation Center in May of 2000.  He was the Executive Officer and he was going to be my immediate supervisor for the foreseeable future. I had only been at the Center for about  two or three days and I didn't really know him at all. But beng summonsed to his office in what seemed like immediate fashion, could only portend of a meeting in which I was going to be admonished, corrected, or otherwise told to straighten up and fly right. Wow. I had only been there a couple of days and now this. What could I have done?? Maybe I took too long at lunch. Maybe one of my uniform ribbons or my name tag was improperly placed. Maybe he didn't like the way my department was running and he was going to tell me to straighten it up or else. What could I have done???

So, I took a minute in my own office, tried to gather myself and then walked the corridor down to his office. It was kind of like that movie, The Green Mile, where the prisoners walk a long mile to their execution. Talk about anxiety...walkin' the mile, walkin' the mile, walkin' the mile...  I arrived at his office, poked my head in, and knocked on the door: "Yes, sir?", I said. He replied very matter-of-factly, "Come on in. Close the door. Have a seat."

Well, that sealed the deal. When your boss tells you to come in and close the door behind you, he's generally not going to tell you you are getting recommended for the Medal of Honor.

I sat down, heart beginning to beat through my chest.

CDR Masiero was about 6'-4'', so even sitting down behind his humongous wooden desk, which seemed as wide and long as an aircraft carrier, I felt I was at a disadvantage, and when he leaned forward and slightly squinted his eyes in a very inquisitive manner, I knew without absolution that I was toast. Without hesitation, he said to me, "Mike...I heard you're a Dallas Cowboys fan...how do you think they're gonna do next year?" I said, "Excuse me, sir?", dropping my head slightly as if to convey misunderstanding. He then said, "Do you think Jerry Jones is a good owner...I mean, doesn't he meddle a little too much with the team? Why do you think he really fired Jimmy Johnson?"

It's a good thing the chair had an arm rest, because had it not, I would have been on the floor in astonishment. Are you kidding me? You called me into your office to ask me about the Dallas freakin' Cowboys? What is this, some kinda trick? Yeah, I love the Cowboys, but is this really what you wanna talk about?

Honestly, I can't even remember what I told him. All I really know is this: he didn't admonished me. He didn't yell at me. He didn't tell me I was a hopeless bum. Nor did he have me executed by electric chair or firing squad. And to this day, he and I still talk about sports and life. We talk about the NBA, MLB, NCAA, our college-age daughters, the Sopranos (he loves that Italian mob stuff, but with a name like Masiero, can you blame him?), and yes, even the Dallas Cowboys.

So what does this all mean in terms of what we can learn and from that which we can improve? Well, think about the implied communications and the perceptions that are involved when a person in power or of authority summonses a person of lesser power and authority to his/her presence. The implication and perception is that the  person that is lower on the ladder is in trouble. Just the other day, both of my daughters shocked me when they told me that when I call them downstairs into my man-cave, they think they are in trouble. I had no idea I was giving off that perception! I thought that they would think that I just wanted to talk to them to see how their day was going or to learn what they were up to. But, they said they always start wondering what they have done wrong and they feel great anxiety and trepidation! This was actually shocking to me, but given my own experience with CDR Masiero, it probably shouldn't have been.

What you have to learn is this: when you are in a position of authority or power, you have to be acutely aware of how you are perceived. You're the boss. When you call someone to your office, cubicle, space, whatever,  there will almost always be an automatic perception of potential trouble. You have to be able to communicate verbally or non-verbally that there really are no problems at hand before the person comes to your space. This is very, very critical to how you handle issues, so be very attentive to it. No matter how you think you are perceived, you are probably incorrect. You are likely being perceived as if you are going to be upset, angry, or handing out trouble. Be very attentive to this when you call your children, also! They are even more perceptible to this problem!

Secondly, when we are in a subordinate position, we should not jump to conclusions. There really was no reason for me to think that my boss was gonna chew my butt. Of course, all it takes is one bad experience of being called into your boss's office and having your head handed to you for you to relate all instances of being called into the office with future trouble. Obviously, this is not always the case. Just be aware that trouble is not always at hand because even the boss is probably not as educated as you are now about the importance of explicit communication when you call someone to your space.  Believe it or not, sometimes the boss just wants the scoop on the Dallas Cowboys.